P B K | Pink Brutus Knits

Pink Brutus Knits Blog

settled, slow, and green bananas.

The first snowfall of the season came swirling down early this month, pressing us into our deep winter settling earlier than usual.  I managed to finish up four designs and three holiday gifts these past weeks which I'm still surprised by even after all of my experience dancing with deadlines.  Each time a series of samples come sliding off the needles, I'm relieved.

While the rest of us are ready to turn in early and our pace slows, Mae has been bubbling over with energy.  She entertains us with silly stories, original free-style raps, and some serious moves.  Once the girls are tucked in I find myself creeping back downstairs and enjoying the special quiet darkness makes.  I can get some writing done in that saturated peace that daylight simply doesn't possess.

I'm glad to be riding the flow of the tide right now as I'm also riding the ebb of a serious flare-up.  These flares rush in, crashing over me in varying degrees of intensity and even though I had a severe flare over the summer, it was brief.  I'm afraid I won't be so lucky this time around.  The past couple days, both fibromyalgia and lupus pains are hammering down and in addition to the aching from my ears to my hips, my hands are completely numb except for feeling bolts of pain through my fingertips making knitting (even typing) nearly impossible. I've never been so eager to be able to do laundry and vacuum!  HA!

The only other project nagging at me is my Certified Instructor Program which, again, I've completed nearly all the knitting for - I have only one swatch to finish out of about 15 or so.  This is something I've had on my do-this-someday list for years along with getting my hands back in clay.  Having idle hands is bringing on dreams of mud ten-fold... and opening the flood gate of fret over my productivity clock.  I see my abilities as a woman in advanced age - I don't buy green bananas any more.  I'm not slipping into a dark place, simply one where time truly is slipping away and I don't have the luxury of putting off these things any longer.  The up-turn being that while I can, I do.  

courtney spainhowerComment